This was a crazy week of football. Particularly for the Patriots, who lost 2 major components of their offense. Let’s see what happened in that game and check the other news around the league.
Indianapolis 13 – Houston 7
The Colts just keep finding ways to win. Luck and Garoppolo both would like a reset in these performances, combining for 5 interceptions. Stevan Ridley picked up the slack for the Colts with 110 yards on the ground, while Foster could only manage 38. Griff Whalen and Andre Johnson scored the only touchdowns on the day, while Vinatieri’s 2 field goals provided the winning margin. The Texans would have loved to end the Colts undefeated streak, but it wasn’t to be.
Coach Martin, do you think your Luck will run out soon? No pun intended.
Nah, I have Luck on my side.
Seriously, it’s great to have such a poised quarterback who can still lead in times of crisis. Even when he isn’t playing well, he’s a leader. Lucky me.
I guess I’ll ride the wave until I’m all outta luck.
One too many huh. Well, ok. This is awkward.
Coach Davenport, you gave the Colts all they could handle. Do you think your team will be better for this loss?
You’d always prefer to learn from wins as opposed to losses. But we gave one of the top teams in the league a tough time, and despite the loss our confidence as a team is rising. We feel we can play with anyone. And we’ll continue to prove it week after week.
Chicago 70 – Atlanta 7
Now this is getting ridiculous. Jay Cutler threw a record setting 9 touchdowns in what will be called the most embarrassing loss ever for the Falcons. Matt Ryan threw 5 interceptions, and was then forced to watch the Chicago offense in what was basically an 11 man drill. Trindon Holliday racked up another 281 yards and 4 touchdowns as his record setting pace stayed on track. I don’t know how a coach can survive a loss such as this, but we will soon find out.
Cutler, why do you think you guys continued to pass so much with the game in hand?
Why shouldn’t we? Do what works. Seems simple to me.
Jacksonville 10 – Tennessee 6
Blake Bortles and Charlie Whitehurst both managed to set modern quarterbacking back 10 years with this game. Offense was just hard to come by, although Marqise Lee had another great game with 130 yards receiving and the game’s lone touchdown. Sen’Derrick Marks managed 2 sacks for the Jags, while Zach Brown notched 3 for the Titans. The Jags have managed to pull even at 3-3, and the fanbase is feeling good about the team’s direction.
Coach King, you seem to be gaining the trust of the fans. How does that make you feel?
It’s huge to have the support of the fans. We need them to believe in us. We need them to show up and encourage the players, let them know they are committed to us as we are to them. So to feel like we are making strides in that area is fantastic.
New York Jets 31 – Denver 17
Coach Chism was away from the team this week with a death in the family, so his assistant coaches had to hold down the fort. The Jets sensed that the Broncos were distracted and took advantage for a huge win. Geno Smith and Michael Vick split the QB duties, and they managed to do enough to win. Peyton was picked off twice, and sacked 6 times. I haven’t seen Manning with that much dirt on his jersey since…..ever. Chris Johnson’s 85 yards helped the Jets keep the ball out of Manning’s hands, and the defense made the most of his mistakes.
Coach Whitfield, did you use the blueprint Seattle laid out in the Superbowl?
So everytime a defense has a good day against Manning, Seattle will be credited huh. Contrary to popular belief, defense wasn’t invented when Pete Carroll arrived in Seattle. Sheesh. We came to punch them in the mouth, and we did.
Minnesota 26 – Detroit 20
Christian Ponder is one of many backup quarterbacks who was needed this week. He didn’t have the greatest game, but Adrian Peterson’s 161 yards and 3 touchdowns saved the day. Matthew Stafford was efficient, but he didn’t have enough time to work thanks to Minnesota’s 26 first downs. Ball control and defense are often the remedy to mediocre QB play, and today was no exception. Well, holding the Lions to 12 rushing yards helped as well I presume.
Coach Wilf, how were you able to be so dominant against the run?
Our front four played with an intensity usually saved for the playoffs. They looked angry out there. Disrespected. They wanted to remind the league what they are capable of. They hear the praise heaped upon the other defenses and they want their just due. Take notice.
New England 42 – Buffalo 21
No Gronk? No BRADY?!?!?!?!? No problem! Ryan Mallett did his best Brady impression with 4 TD’s and 388 yards passing. Shane Vereen lightened the load with 116 yards on the ground. Fred Davis was Mallett’s security blanket, ringing up 116 yards as well. Danny Amendola added 80 yards as well. Brady will be sidelined for a little while, so Mallett has a chance to make some money right now if he plays well. Let’s wish him luck.
Mallett, did you sense any negative energy in the huddle?
No, not at all. These guys just want to win, That’s it. Brady was my biggest supporter today. He has been through this before, and all he wants more than anything is for me to do my job as his backup and play well. We all know who our leader is, but in his absence I have to lead.
Carolina 20 – Cincinnati 7
Coach Bugg was able to lead his troops to their first win of the season by defeating the Bengals. Cam Newton completed 80 percent of his passes, but the defense was the offense for the most part. A.J. Green found the end zone once, but the Bengals just couldn’t get into a rhythm against the stifling Carolina defense. Both of these teams have to make up serious ground if they want to see the playoffs.
Coach Bugg, your defense was impressive today. What do you attribute that to?
I can’t really say. Maybe some players wanted to impress the new staff. Maybe some fear they will lose their spot. Whatever the vase is, the bar has been set. I will not accept less than this effort moving forward. I have seen what this defense is capable of, so now I will know when they aren’t giving max effort.
Coach Teague, high expectations were placed on this team after Dalton’s extension. Do you think you can meet them?
I don’t care what any of you expect. *walks away abruptly without fielding more questions*
Cleveland 35 – Pittsburgh 21
Manziel threw 4 touchdowns to lead his team to a win over their division rivals. Ben Tate ran wild for 145 yards to aid the cause and keep the Browns undefeated in 2014. Money Manziel couldn’t have predicted such a storybook start to his NFL career, but here we are. Billy Winn had three sacks to lead the Browns defense and make Big Ben miserable all day. The Steelers only managed 18 rushing yards, which is pretty much all you need to know to understand the score.
Johnny, did you think after draft day you would be 5-0 at this point?
I would be lying if I said I didn’t. I felt I would win the job, and I felt I would win games. That’s what I do. Shout out my OVO fam.
Green Bay 22 – Miami 17
Miami let a winnable game slip away with some late defensive gaffes to fall to 3-2. Even though Aaron Dodgers faced pressure all day from the front four, he was able to get the victory in the end as he has many times before. Tannehill threw a back-breaking interception late, and he continues to play uneven football. It seems to be a confidence issue, and one wonders if he has lost the confidence of his coach and teammates.
Coach Brown, is Tannehill your quarterback of the future?
I prefer to talk about the present. He is presently our quarterback. That’s as much as I’m willing to say.
Seattle 31 – Dallas 7
Seattle’s defense has a performance we’ve become accustomed to seeing in dominating the Cowboys. Romo threw 3 interceptions and then suffered an injury, forcing Weeden into duty. Marshawn Lynch ran for 139 yards and 2 TD’s to give the offense a boost. Dez Bryant couldn’t find any room to work with, and he was visibly frustrated all game. Kam Chancellor picked Romo off twice, and Richard Sherman caught the third.
Coach Moore, is Dez unhappy with his role in the offense?
Dez is passionate. That passion manifests itself in many ways on and off the field. He was frustrated with his lack of production, but no blame was placed. He simply wanted to help the team win and he couldn’t. Any player worth their roster part would be upset.
New York Giants 31 – Philadelphia 19
The Giants won their second in a row on the back of Rashad Jennings. His 126 yards and 2 TD’s propelled the Giants to a huge division win. Jerrel Jernigan caught 2 TD’s from Eli in what amounted to his best game as a pro. Jeremy Maclin had 109 yards receiving, while LeSean McCoy ran for 150 yards and 2 TD’s in the losing effort. Coach Brown is off to a fast start, but he will face a stiff test next week against the rival Cowboys.
Coach Brown, do you sense momentum building in your locker room?
Yes. Wins can do that. We don’t want to get ahead of ourselves, but we do feel like we can turn this thing around quickly. We just have to play to our potential week after week, and we have a chance to climb out of this hole.
San Francisco 28 – St. Louis 10
Can anyone stop the runaway train that is San Fran? The Rams tried and failed, thanks to Gore and Kaepernick’s 2 TD’s a piece. Corey Lemonier had….wait is this a typo? 8 sacks? Really? 8 SACKS? Aldon Smith followed up with 4, and Sam Bradford’s agent followed that with inquires about a broadcsting career for his client. The Niners look unstoppable, but we’ve seen this movie before. Can they rewrite the ending?
Coach Coach, how do you plan to finally win the Superbowl that eluded your team the past 3 years?
Easy. Win it.
There you have it everyone. We’re nearing the halfway point of the season, and pressure will soon cause some teams to fold. Stay tuned to see who.